IMAGE ASSOCIATION: Vol. II

TIME TRAVEL: Culture Club

Let's take a trip back to 1983 when Boy George was still kind of cool. This song was Culture Club's foray into the White Reggae scene:



Culture Club - Do You Really Want to Hurt Me?

Did anyone else notice the Hebrew on Boy George's sweatshirt/tunic/unclassifiable garment? Jewish culture and fake reggae combining...does this sound familiar? Was Boy George the original Matisyahu?

TRUE STORY: Reassuring Quotes From U.S. Presidents

"I am not fit for this office and should never have been here."
-Warren G. Harding (29th president)

"I think I might as well give up being a candidate. There are so many people in the country who don't like me."
-William Howard Taft (27th president)

"The Bank is trying to kill me, but I shall kill it! "
-Andrew Jackson (7th president)

"I outlived the bastards."
-Herbert Hoover (31st president)

"I know only two tunes: one of them is 'Yankee Doodle', and the other one isn't."
-Ulysses S. Grant (18th president)

"I am the last President of the United States!"
-James Buchanan (15th president)

RISING TRENDS: Improved Gorilla/Human Relations

An eternal friendship between humans and gorillas was looking pretty likely once word got out that Koko the gorilla could communicate with sign language.

But this nipple loving she-beast threw it all away in a sexual harassment case. (not kidding) Where did it go wrong between us and them? Is it because we are a highly evolved, clearly superior version of them? Whatever it was that caused this rift seems to be water under the bridge, because our research analyst team has noted increasing numbers of true friendships between gorillas and humans.

Yes, things are looking up for gorilla lovers. And for the rest of you: I suggest hopping on this trend fast because the Western Gorilla is currently listed as critically endangered. By the time you decide it might be cool to have a gorilla-friend, it may be too late.

[TIP] if supplies are scarce, you may find that teaming up with another human and sharing your gorilla can be a nice alternative. Everyone likes a gorilla sandwich.

COOL ANIMAL O' THE WEEK: Alpacas

The alpaca is a South American "camelid" often confused for a llama. But they're so clearly different. Alpacas are slightly smaller and cuter. 

I was really into getting one of these as a pet or personal wool factory or something, but then I discovered this disturbing photograph!

What happened to you, alpacas!? All that adorable, fluffy fur is just a lie. Underneath you look like weird lizards. Well worry no longer, my friends, the alpaca has been exposed! Don't let these camelids fool you any longer.

IMAGE ASSOCIATION: Vol. I

EDUCATION: Become the Master of the Internet

I wish this was for real. 

:-(

RISING TRENDS: Double Glasses

WIth summer in full swing, sunglasses are becoming an important concern. But what to do if you need prescription lenses? Easy. Just put some shades on over your regular glasses. 

Do you prefer to be discreet when wearing two pairs of glasses? 

Or would you rather flash your second pair proudly?

Remember, this trend is not only for blocking dangerous UV rays, but when your prescription is out of date, you can simply sport another pair of clear glasses to strengthen your vision. 

COOL ANIMAL O' THE WEEK: Jackalope

What better way to kick off my "Cool Animal o' the Week" feature than with the legendary jackalope? 

Some heretics argue that this beautiful creature doesn't exist, but they obviously haven't google image searched it. 

What do you think?

Is the jackalope alive and bounding? 

Is it possible for the jackalope be domesticated?

Can a jackalope grow large enough to accommodate a human?

TRUE STORY: Biz Markie

Maybe you remember Biz Markie's 1989 hit "Just a Friend":

The video spawned the brief revival of the "Mozart Look", but 

do you ever wonder what the 44 year old rapper is up to now? 

Well wonder no longer, because Biz is still in the biz. In fact, 

he has his own segment on the Nick Jr. television series, 

Yo Gabba Gabba! In "Biz's Beat of the Day" Markie uses his skills 

to teach youngsters the art of beat boxing.

[HOMEWORK] check out the special edition halloween episode.

Blog-i-festo

Just as the cavemen ventured out into the wild to scavenge for food, 

I browse the internet hunting for stories to nourish my family and friends.